plz talk dirty to me
Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize
