Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
