Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
His nipple licking is glorious
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