**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
