I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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