so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
