Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
