If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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