yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
