but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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