This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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