Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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