Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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