we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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