Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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