I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
