I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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