Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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