btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I need to sanitize my soul.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
