Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Randomize
