why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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