I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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