It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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