Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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