I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize
