we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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