so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
