fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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