U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
