I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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