I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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