I think I just saw someone hide a body.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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