im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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