whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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