Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
