i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
