if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I have feelings that need drinking.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
