who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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