It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
