I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
