i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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