To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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