He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Randomize