Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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