Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Randomize
