no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
