Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
