I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Just pee around me
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize
