our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
