Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
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